I'll Try Again...

First of all, I need to apologize for our lack of blogging. Re-entry into "real" life has taken some adjustment. More adjustment than I ever would have imagined. I expected to come home changed, but I never expected to feel like THIS. I'm still trying to figure out what THIS is and assumed I needed to have that accomplished before I could continue journaling our trip. I think I've finally come to the conclusion that it may be awhile before I understand all that I'm feeling and thinking. And I'm afraid that if I wait until then, the memories of the trip will have faded and I'll be unable to share from the heart. So, I warn you in advance, I have no idea how this post will develop from here. I'm hoping that if I relive our journey again with you, then maybe all the scattered pieces of my emotions will settle down with some clarity in my heart.

So here goes...

Our last post ended with sharing about our wonderful time in Standard One. One of the biggest smiles that I've had in the past week just spontaneously erupted on this face! Standard One = Big Smile. 'Nuf said.

After Standard One, we were privileged to help in the Feeding Center. The Feeding Center provides meals to the children who attend the Free School as well as the children of the community. Everday from 12:30pm - 2:30pm, the children of Kibera can receive a free hot meal. They begin to line up each morning around 10am in anticipation of their one meal of the day. Since the feeding center is not a large building, they run in shifts. After each group is done eating, another group comes in. We began by serving food to the first group. We served ugali and boiled cabbage. I sure wish we would have taken a moment to capture a picture of the ugali for you. Ugali is a traditional Kenyan dish. It's a very heavy starch that has little nutritional value but fills the stomach. We were shown (once) how to portion the plates. Apparently, we didn't pay enough attention to our tutorial, because after serving the first group of people we were "fired" and banished to washing dishes.

Think of all the dishes that your family washes after Thanksgiving meal and then multiply that by 100. Next, subtract your dishwasher, garbage disposal and air conditioning (well, depending on where you live you may not need to subtract the air conditioning. In Arizona, A/C is still required at Thanksgiving). Then, add fashionable boots, loose goats and millions of giggles. That would come close to equaling our time washing dishes at the feeding center. It was an absolute joy!!

Here's a couple of photos of the feeding center.

And here's us banished outside to wash dishes.

I know you're jealous of the boots. It's okay. We know how cute they are.

It's been helpful to remember that serving can be a joy. And I get to walk out a bit of that joy tomorrow with my mom. No, it's not the feeding center in Kenya. It's a feeding center here in Phoenix. But because I spent some time today remembering the amazing joy I experienced in that "kitchen" in Kibera, I can hopefully share some of that same joy in the kitchen of St. Vincent de Paul tomorrow. How like my God to allow me this opportunity to work through the emotions of my heart and serve His people at the same time.

Somehow, my heart feels lighter and fuller. I feel the beginning of LIFE being restored to my heart. Can I leave you with this amazing truth? It's one that has proved true in my life over and over again. Especially today.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

Still on Kenya Time Apparently

Well, it's 1:30am on Saturday morning. I've been home for about 7 hours or so. I went to bed around 8pm because it's been an exhausting 2 weeks, and I didn't think my body could go any longer. I figured going to bed early and getting a good night's sleep would get my body back on Arizona time in a flash. Then I woke up at 1am and here I am. I don't think sleep is coming anytime soon, so I figured I might as well begin the long journey of blogging our trip.

We arrived in Nairobi on Wednesday, October 29th at approx. 9pm. The airport was packed and we were so glad that we were with a group who'd been there before, because we would have been lost in no time. Getting our visa and going through customs was a fairly painless process that took about 1 1/2 hours. When we were cleared to retrieve our luggage, the gentlemen who'd been cleared before us had already grabbed some of our luggage off the conveyor belt. Since we had a total of 12 bags (including carry-ons), it truly looked ridiculous and we couldn't help but tell the guys that we weren't sure if we had the right shoes for each outfit (they actually weren't too amused, believe it or not). In reality, we each only brought one suitcase and one carry-on as personal baggage, the rest held the gifts we were able to bring to the orphanage. One of the guys traveling with us, Nick, had his luggage lost. The airport said they'd probably have it for him to pick up the next day, however it actually never showed up in Nairobi. I think he actually handled it very well considering he was at the mercy of the other guys to lend him clothes the entire trip. I'm not sure I'd have done so well.

Our entry into Kibera Kids Center was late at night and we really weren't able to get a good look. We had a brief meeting in what we called the "command center" which was a communal family room of sorts and then we were off to bed.

After a couple hours of sleep, we got our first glimpse of the orphanage and the slums right behind it. This was the view from our room (note the slums in the background).

The sight is so strange from every direction. The orphanage is absolutely beautiful with all sorts of flowers and trees and grass. But just beyond the orphanage wall is such squalor. The contrast is so sharp. The people in the slums call the orphanage the "Garden of Eden". And the name fits. It truly is a remarkable place of beauty and hope in the midst of such desolation and filth.

On our first day, we had the wonderful privilege of spending time with the children in Standard One. Standard One was the classroom that held the pre-school, kindergarten and 1st grade classes. They don't have enough teachers to allow each grade their own class or teacher, so they combine them. Amie, Brea and I spent time with the pre-schoolers while the teacher, Florence, gave her lesson to the other children. There were 3 pre-schoolers so we each got one-on-one time with a child. I got to spend time with Amos. A precious 4 year old little boy who was so shy at first. I kept talking with him and he'd just look at me with his big brown eyes and keep coloring. We worked on his numbers and his letters in his journal, but it took a long while before he actually spoke to me. And his first words were asking to see my camera. The children were simply fascinated with the digital cameras. They knew what they were and had seen them before, but they LOVED to have their pictures taken. So I let Amos look at the camera and he took a couple of pictures and then we passed it around to Amie and Brea's kids as well. In the meantime, Amos took my hand and traced it in his notebook. I loved the fact that he felt that comfortable with me in such a short time. I took a picture of it and I think it is one of my favorite photos of the whole trip. The contrast of our skin is so beautiful.

And here is my Amos.

Isn't he adorable??

After a little while of playing with our pre-schoolers, Florence mentioned that the other kids in the class had chosen to use their field/play time to spend time in the classroom with the visitors (us). We were amazed and completely humbled that they'd choose us over playing outside. We read books to them, took pictures of them and let them take pictures of us. One of the young girls, Yvonne, started playing patty cake with one of their jingles. She tried to teach me, but I'm a slow learner. That eventually led into the entire class singing songs with Yvonne leading us in worship. I was amazed at the number of worships songs they sang that we already knew. And how precious that it was a first grader leading us. ABSOLUTELY BLEW MY MIND.

Here is a group photo we took with the timer (the kids really thought that was cool). Yvonne is the one in front holding her face in her hands.

That was such a great way to start our time at the orphanage and I still mark that as a highlight of the trip. My heart already misses them terribly. Somehow these children had a way of working themselves into the fabric of my heart and I feel terribly incomplete without them. I am just praying that I will get to see them again some day on this side of heaven.

I'm still emotionally working through everything and feel very disconnected with the world around me right now. I had actually felt so at home there, so completely full. I'm trying to process the fact that I have to go back to normal life and I'm trying not to be resentful about that.

My body is here. My heart is there. Somehow I'll have to learn to live with that division, because I always want my heart to remain there. I'm just hoping that my body will get to join it there again someday.

We're Back

We have arrived on U.S. soil and will be headed to the airport for the last leg of our journey home. Although we did not have internet access while in Nairobi, we did journal our trip. Below is a short entry we typed on the flight from Amsterdam to Nairobi on Wednesday, October 29th.


Apparently best laid plans are just that. Best laid. Internet access is neither easy nor cheap, it seems. We were told in Atlanta that the plan we purchased would work in Amsterdam, not so. We are still unsure of how often, if at all, we will have access in Nairobi.

Our flights have been relatively uneventful. We were able to have our seats reassigned on both legs of the journey so that we were all able to sit together. On our way to Amsterdam we were packed in like sardines and tried very hard to get some sleep. We rested our eyes for a few hours, but real sleep eluded us. We finally arrived in the Netherlands. Caffeine was the first order of business. Amie and I had a croissant with java and boy was it GOOD. It was still warm and flaky. I am looking forward to ordering another on our return trip.
Half of our group left from Atlanta (which we did) and the other half left from Washington, D.C. The plan was to meet up in Amsterdam and continue on to Nairobi together. Unfortunately, the Washington group’s departure flight was delayed by 2 ½ hours and they missed their connection in Amsterdam. Our group coordinator, David, is working through alternate travel plans for them. But so far it seems that all the options will have them arrive the following afternoon at the earliest. They will have had to endure an additional travel day, mostly sitting in an airport, and will begin their work at the orphanage very tired. Please pray for them.

Our flight to Nairobi was very comfortable. There were many empty seats and we were able to spread out and we each got some good sleep. We are so very thankful for that.
We have approximately one hour before we land in Kenya. Excited doesn’t even begin to cover it.

We are still planning to blog each day, but there is a strong possibility we won’t be able to upload our posts until we get back to Atlanta.

Hope all is well with you.
That’s all for now.

Update: The Washington, D.C. group took a flight from Amsterdam to Paris and then on to Nairobi and eventually joined us the next morning.

We will continue to post our thoughts and journey in the hours and days to come.

hello from Atlanta

We haven't been blogging because there was no internet in Africa, anywhere.
so yeah, and I'm not gonna start right now cause there's too much to do.
So you'll be hearing from me soon hopefully.

A Blogging Tutorial (from the most inexperienced blogger in history)

Many people have mentioned that they are following our world famous blog with baited breath. Which has actually surprised us because y'all haven't been leaving us much praise or shout outs in the comments. So by popular demand we are offering you a free how to.

At the end of each post is a "signature" of sorts that says who it was posted by and at what time. Next to it will show how many comments have been posted to that particular post. To view the comments (or to eventually leave a comment), click on "comment". Read through the comments others have left, then type your own comment in the comment box to the right. (say comment much?) After you've left us some love, scroll down and select Name/Url. An additional box should appear for you to place your name. Type in your name (I thought this was probably pretty obvious, but you never know who's on the other side of the screen - Mom). Then click on Publish Comment. Voila!

So, everybody now, show us that we really can teach old dogs new tricks and post us a comment. We'd love to hear from you, too!!



P.S. Brea says "discuted" is the new "disgusted" (see her post below for explanation).

P.P.S Please consider this your advanced warning that we won't be proof reading much - as already evidenced. Please don't judge us - we are desperately sleep deprived.

P.P.P.S. Please comment! Thanks.

Sitting on the floor in Atlanta

Well I'm sitting here in the airport blogging, and I'm at a lost of words.

I'm extremely excited but if you saw me you wouldn't be able to tell. My face is very blank, and I'm not talking much. Yeah me, Brea Rowland, NOT talking:D. I'm just so overwhelmed with so many emotions my face doesn't know what one to express, so it stays blank. Until it makes up it's mind every once in a while and a smile will pop out or a tear. My travel buddies have noticed and will point out when I'm smiling. Which makes me very awkward to know it's that noticable, but I'll deal.

Well on the plane we were the loudest, messiest group(as is me and my mom) on there. Holly was not expecting what she got out of us which was spill after spill of drinks. What I did not expect was how much they talked! They blabbered like teenage girls(which if they're reading this they're thinking we are at heart and I AGREE), not only did they talk nonstop there ears apparently were clogged so there voices were 10 notches above all the noise in the plane. (And I'd know about noise I come from a house that has 10 people 1 being a toddler and the others teenagers, girl teenagers (minus my parents and my brother)) It was cracking me up because I could tell on some people's faces how they felt about it and I just laughed.

Side note as I got off the plane about 10 steps after we got out of the tunnel I see this mean machine looking thing and finaly figure out it's a trash can, but it was plugged into the outlet.(strange lookin thing) So I think nothing of it after a while, and when we all got situated we started to try and figure out where to go next, I took the lead and all of a sudden I hear this growlish sound and almost jump. I look over and it's the trashcan, and at this time my face has a confused discuted look on it. This guy sees me and kinda looks the same way at me, and I explain to him that the trashcan just growled at me. His face changed so quickly I couldn't help but laugh, his facial express was as if he was saying ok freak, I'll be leaving you and you're growling trashcan alone, and quickly walked away. Once my mom and Holly catch up to me I explain why I'm laughing and we carry on to our gate. Well just a second ago Holly said Brea watch and thinking it was an automatic garbage can does this circleish fancy move, thinking it would open and she'd look like a magician. To our suprise it wasn't automatic, so she tried to cover it up by circling in her hand and reaching to throw her trash away. Right as she gets back my mom, her, and me are cracking up laughing. I'm almost to tears, and Holly's face is red from embarassment and loss of air. :DD Just one of many embarassing thing's that have happened today.

At her defense there is a senserish lookin thing, look for yourself:]]

Let Your Voice Be Heard

Just a real quick note before Amie picks me up (I wonder if she got any more sleep than I did?). I know this has absolutely nothing to do with Kenya or our trip, BUT it is very near and dear to all three of us....

A week from now is election day. Please, oh, please GO VOTE!!

God bless you all and God bless America.

Final thoughts while stateside...

It is 10:40 pm. We need to be at airport at 4:30 am. I am still packing.
Not because I am taking so much stuff - but mostly because I am a scattered wreck!

I will never be able to express my awe while watching our God meet every need in abundance during these past 7 weeks! I will also never be able to express my gratitude for the precious people in our lives that have prayed, encouraged, shopped, supported, given, and cried with and for us while prepping for our journey! I am truly humbled and amazed!!!

THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF THIS TRULY OVERWHELMED HEART!!!!

6 hours...my mind can't comprehend what is finally taking place!
6 hours...my heart can't wait to get my hands on those kids!
6 hours...my body wants to fall into bed!

Good night from America! SEE YOU IN KENYA!!!! (goosebumps just flaired!!:)

Not Wasting an Ounce

Today is our last full day in the States before we head out to A-F-R-I-C-A!!! I wanted to post these pictures for you all to see the BOUNTY we are privileged to bring to the orphans and missionaries in Kibera. We packed and unpacked and repacked these bags probably a dozen times this weekend to fully maximize the weight allowance. We are allowed 50 lbs in each checked bag.

And the results are.....

50.0 lbs. of baby clothes

(not even an ounce was wasted!!)

49.0 lbs. of school supplies

49.0 lbs. of medical supplies, candy & more school supplies

(this actually has way more medical supplies we just packed the candy on top of it).

And here we are in the midst of all the fun...

It was an absolute blast knowing that EVERY SINGLE ITEM will be a blessing.

Here's a big THANK YOU to everyone who gave.

Control

Well our trip is soon, and I'm surprisingly calm right now.

I don't know what's happening but I think God's preparing me for what I'm going to see very soon. This past Wednesday one of my youth leaders prepared a lesson on my trip and the organizational I'm going with. After her lesson she asked for me to come to the front to be recognized and prayed for. Well lets just say I broke down completely. I sobbed like a baby. Not only did I sob, I sobbed in front of my WHOLE youth group. If you know me you'll know I don't like looking weak in front of people, so crying in front of my whole youth group was NOT what I wanted to do, but exactly what i needed. It's strange how God works that way; he makes us do what we don't want too, to show he knows what's best for us, and that he has control. Which brings up my next topic, control. I like being in control of my life, mainly because I'm extremely independent, and have been for most part. I like making decisions for myself and thinking for myself not others thinking for me. Well God knows that and has put me through some trials in my life that I had no control over whatsoever. Which caused me to not trust him at all. Throughout the years me and him have worked on it and I started to trust him again, then the wave of death hit and I wanted to trust him so much but I just couldn't, it hurt to badly. Again I talked, sometimes yelled, with God to work out the trust factor. He made it clear through scripture and lessons at church that he was looking out for me, and would never put me through something I couldn't overcome. Well this Wednesday all of a sudden I realized what I really would be seeing during this trip, and I didn't think I could do it. The devil knew my weakness and made it very clear to me that I would fail. I was overcome with defeat. I didn't think I could do what God has called me to do for over 5 years. I didn't think I could look at children's faces in the slums, and leave them there. That I couldn't see them starving, and abandon them. I know how it feels to starve and can't imagine how it feels to have no hope on top of that. I started praying to God and kept thinking I can't, I can't do that. God you've made a mistake, I've made a mistake. I can't do that, I can't live with myself, I'm not ready. After I calmed down he started to show me why he picked me. He revealed to me that this trip wasn't only about me ministering to them, it's also them ministering to me, and it started to become very clear what my trip was going to be about; for me to help bring hope to Kibera, and Kibera bringing me and God closer, in more then one way. I started to understand that it would help me to be able to trust him because others more unfortunate then me could. Which has helped me so much. It's crazy how God works sometimes, that he can defeat the devil, even if he's picked the weakest part of you, and make it completely positive. Also God made me realized I'm there to help, not to harm or abandon them. That I'll be seen as hope, but I can't stop after my trip, I have to keep helping and praying or nothing will change. And that's the last thing I want.