Restless

Well we have less then 3 weeks left, and I only have 9 days left of school.
As it's getting closer I can feel myself getting more excited, as much as I try to hide it, inside I'm going crazy with excitement. I don't want people to see me excited because, if it doesn't work(GOD forbid) I don't want them to know how disappointed I'll feel, my pride gets in the way I guess, an area God and I are still working on.

It is mind blowing that in 3 short weeks I'll be in Kenya, MY Kenya. I'll be able to breathe Kenyan air, see beautiful Kenyan landscape, feel the sun or rain on my skin IN Kenya. That finally I'll be home. Even though it isn't my birthplace, it's where God has called me, where God has put a burden on my heart to be. He's put me through trials so that I'll be ready, and FINALLY it's my time. It's crazy how I've never been there but already know, it's my home. I'm thankful to God that he's made it clear that that's where I'm meant to be, but at the same time I'm restless here. I'm starting to feel like a stranger in my own "home", and to friends and family in Arizona. It's feeling like a prison instead of a loving, warm place that it once was. I'm hoping my trip there will be a way for me to start to be thankful for Arizona once again. It's so American of me, I have endless possibility here and yet, I can't stand even looking around. That the land of the FREE is feeling like that land of the prisoners. And I know Kenya will be an eye opener at the least. I know I'm starting to ramble but that is what i do best. To put it into shorter words I'm just SO thankful for the chance to go and be with "my" people and help them as much as I can. Even though I know it's going to be one of the hardest things to leave; I'm just glad I have the chance to see my future home, for however long it may be.